And Now it's Time for a Breakdown

Well it's been a few days, I sat and let it all marinate, and now I'm ready to give my thoughts on the election. I MOSTLY kept it presidential in this post; I could easily go on for a month about the Mourdocks and the Akins out there, but I'll spare you. So here are the hate lockers official takeaways from this election season.

#1: It doesn't all come down to the money.
To the Mitts, Mitch McConnells, and Scott walkers, out there... stop looking at the money. pay no attention (or at least a little less) to the man behind the wallet, because HE IS NOT YOUR MASTER; WE ARE. I write this blog because too many of us are too obsessed with too much of the wrong thing. Celebrity, bling, toys, whatever. Everybody wants everyone else to look at them, and everybody wants a bunch of stuff. I realized at some point that truly ,whatever they SAY they want, what they REALLY want is control.... influence.....guess what senators, governors, and congressmen? You already have that. you dont need to suck up to Sheldon Adelson, or the Koch brothers or anyone else for that matter. You're a participant in the most venerated legislative body in the history of democracy. You not only have the ability to influence your environment, you have the ability to influence the environment and the health and the safety and the well being and the education of MILLIONS of people. You're in a position to help shape our society into a more perfect union. So why the fuck are you still worshipping the money? You think you need the money to stay where you're at? Forget about illusions of control and power, you have influence!* If you do your job with integrity and principle, the money can't beat you. President Obama just proved that. Sheldon Adelson kicked in $70 million to try to defeat the President. Karl Rove raised another $370 million. Ralph Reed chipped in $10 mil and the Koch brothers put down another $ 400 million. They ponied up buckets of money and got 0% return on their investment. Hopefully the lesson from this election cycle will be that if you serve #1. the truth and #2. the people, then your public service career need not be a slave to/hostage to/victim of the ALLEGEDLY almighty dollar. If you are a servant of the people, then it's THEIR will that determines your fate, not some billionaire with a self serving agenda. And speaking of the will of the people...

 #2. The outcome of this election is the will of the people.
Obama won a clear majority in the electoral college and in the popular vote. Its especially telling that the Obama victory happened in the face of the "voter fraud is a felony" billboards on the west side of Cleveland, and "election monitors" coming to my old neighborhood back in Pittsburgh asking people for ID as if it was a mandatory to vote. Despite all the attempts at voter suppression, Obama still won in a landslide. Translation: the majority of Americans approve of the president and his policies, and disapproved of the idea of a Romney presidency. Someone wise once said that if you have a problem with one person, hey that happens. If you have the same problem with a second person, it be's like that sometimes. If you got same problem with THREE different people however. it might be time to start looking in the mirror. So if the MAJORITY OF THE COUNTRY finds your policies disagreeable, you might consider asking yourself what your real problem is with the president. I'm not saying that everyone who voted for Romney is a racist, but i am saying that all the racists voted for Romney. Be sure of your real reasons. make sure they stand up to facts. and speaking of facts......

#3. If you are remain in an informational bubble, constantly inhaling recycled facts that were tainted in the first place, eventually you will asphyxiate.
There's no way to spin it. The Romney campaign was predicated on misinformation, disinformation, and lies. From Paul Ryan's "closed factory" whopper at the RNC convention, to Romney's "jeeps to china" lie in the last week of the election. It seemed like these guys lied whenever given an opportunity. I know politicians lie, but generally speaking we're talking about lies of omission or obfuscation....not Romney/Ryan though. These guys told blatant, bald faced, easily refutable fabrications that flew in the face of facts(the Jeep moving to China story), logic (ryans claim that Obama broke a promise to keep a GM plant open that was already closed before he took office), and good taste(benghazi). Now we all know that there are those guys out there for whom lying is almost a part of their charm, but Mitt Romney is definitely not that guy. and speaking of not that guy.

 #4. Come on, ya'll knew he wasn't the guy....
Really, look at him

and tell me he's not the 40 years on version of Stan Gable from Revenge of the Nerds

Admittedly the republican primary field was pretty damn weak this time around, but seriously, this is the best ya'll could do? This smarmy, smirking self important, flip flopping flake? A dude with a moral compass built by the Mr. Magoo corporation? A guy that thinks the music of ABBA is "a little too angry?" All that talk of his formidable business acumen, as evidenced by his tenure at Bain capital. Guess what friends, Bain Capital only saw an average investment return somewere in the neighborhood of 30%, really no better than the average for any investment company, plenty of which don't carry a record of outsourcing, downsizing simply to pad profits, or generally running roughshod over the basic tenets of human decency or business ethics. At best Romney's business model is somewhat flawed, at worst it's truly immoral. But hey that's the beauty and purity of the free market, right? And if 47% or so get trampled underfoot so "Papa" John Schnatta can have another yacht, hey what are you gonna do? Just too bad, right? And that was the real question posed to us over the last year and a half. What kind of country are we? What kind of a people are we? are we the nation of "sorry about your luck?" the nation of "you don't look like me or mine so it's in my best interest to be indifferent to you and yours"? Or are we the nation of "we're all in this together"? The nation of "you don't have to look like me in order for me to give a damn about you"? Personally, I believe we are the latter. Since tuesday, I have felt a profound sense of gratitude that a significant majority in this country feels the same. And so as we bid a farewell to this 2012 election season, I'll send Governor Romney off with what I never could've realized was such an appropriate song until really thinking about the 7 year Romney candidacy and the American people's thoughts on it \
"....yes sir....I give to the Needy...and not the Greedy....uh-huh, that's right!"

Here's a Quarter....

So what piece of pop culture pablum will we try to choke down today? Non other than everyone's favorite Jamoroquai tribute band, MAROON 5! Now...to be honest, I've always dug this band. Douchebaggery notwithstanding, Adam Levine is a fine singer. Harder to breathe, from their 1st major, was a great song; They had a great many on their first several albums. As time wore on thoughthe writing began to seem somewhat lazy, as if they just know what's expected of them so they just do that, like when you go to movie with Samuel L Jackson. Their songs just got lazier and lazier and the pinnacle of that downward spiral? Payphone. I wanted to like Payphone. Wiz Khalifa is from Pittsburgh, like me, so I'm predisposed to root for him. Couldn't do it. Why? No CENTER. Seriously, no four bars of this song seem to have anything to do with the others, from the stretch voweled chorus, to the Akon-esque verse four bars later. Another four bars of that, and then into a cadenc-ey pre-chorus that to me sounds like a yapping dog. Go ahead, listen again and tell me I'm wrong. Go on, do it now, I'll wait........see what I mean? Next up is an alternate chorus; a mid range take on the same melodic concept. Believe it or not, Payphone is almost as boring to listen to as this post is to read. Of course, these are all aesthetic things. Some people like Akon, some people like yapping. The real problem is that as far as I can tell, Payphone is just a collection of disjointed hooks and melodies. It might as well be four guys in four different rooms writing different words to the same track. Generally, bands have the opposite problem: they'll put out a new song that sounds just like the last one. In this case one song sounds like a dozen different songs. Songs about Jane proved in spades that these guys can put out a great album. Payphone is the first single from their new one Overexposed I’ve often said that it must be nice to be Like a U2, or a Bruce Springsteen, or another one of those acts that gets to a point where they could put out more or less anything at all and still have that certainty that their album WILL BE BOUGHT. The unfortunate side effect of this is songs like Payphone. With this song they literally phoned it in.

You're Not Getting What You Pay For

Rejoice Fellow Haters, I have returned! Welcome back to the Locker, thanks for visiting. I have Misssed yooouuuu(spoken as Smith from The Matrix Revolutions) It's been awhile, but don't think it's because I ran out of stuff to hate on. Quite the contrary, I'll be doing a LOT of catching up over the next several weeks. I hope you enjoy the ride. So what is it that has pulled me out of the abyss of blogger limbo(blogger-tory?)? It started one night driving past the Wiltern Theatre in Los Angeles. the Marquee was of course plugging whoever it was that would be there next, but what Caught my attention was the words directly beneath the Headliner's name: VIP EXPERIENCE: $ After the colon was a ridiculous number. Realizing that number represented a dollar amount I actually swerved a little bit(apologies to the biker). So Let me get this straight. You'll pay several hundred dollars more than what is already a REEALLY high ticket price to have a "VIP Experience"? You know what? I can't even call this bullshit. Calling this bullshit is an insult to bullshit. This is beneath bullshit, this is monkey piss. The VIP Experience is a phrase you see a lot more often these days; the actual experience can vary from venue to venue, including but not limited to anything from pre-seating, premier seating, heightened level of service(drinks, hors de oveurs, Lobster, whatever), perhaps a meet-and-greet with the performer before or after the show. Now the idea of backstage passes is nothing new, but the reference to the "VIP Experience" is(relatively). The difference is the focus. Got a backstage pass? You get to meet someone special. You're getting a VIP experience? the focus shifts to YOU. All of a sudden, YOU'RE the special one. Except, um, no you're not. Once again, it's all about you...I've talked before about why this attitude is really lame. Let me hip all you VIP-experience-wanting monkey pissers out there to exactly what you're in for. You'll be shoved into a room down the hall from the stage with several other of your ilk, someone will hand you a half glass of cheap merlot(it'll probably be watered down)and call you sir. Bet that makes you feel special huh? Then Tom Petty(just picked a name out of a hat)will shuffle in, shake your hand, maybe offer a grin and say "thanks for comin'....." Moments later he will leave that room and promptly resume being completely unaware of your existence. Congratulations, you just became Chun Li in this scene: That's right, you just paid what for some people is a month's worth of paycheck, and it had about as much impact on Mick Jagger as the flier some street teamer put on your windshield outside the bar. You have a vague recollection of it, but only as something dealt with for the briefest of moments, then you continue with your actual life. Don't let the watered down two-buck chuck fool you my friend, you are Yanni's windshield flier. Here's what I hope folks will start to realize before they pull out that Black card: Paying for A VIP experience changes your social status as much as paying for the "girlfriend experience" changes your relationship status. YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL. Special very seldom stands on a wallet. Special isn't legigimized by 18 seconds of flesh-pressing with Bruce Springsteen. Special people ain't thinking about Bruce in terms of their special-ness. Sit down, shut up and enjoy the concert. Rid yourself of this pathological need to have everybody fellate-sturbate your ego. Very Important People don't pay to be(or to feel, or to make other people think they are)special. They just are. Important people do important things. Hey, here's an Idea: Want to be a VIP? Do something very important. Find someone to help. Teach someone how to help themselves. Provide a solution for a problem outside of your own little fortress of entitlement. The first step in being important is to stop pretending you are. The second step is to stop trying to convince others that you are. If you are, those who need to know will know. You can't BUY special; you can only BE special.